X-Message-Number: 1121
Date: 10 Aug 92 19:01:45 EDT
From: Charles Platt <>
Subject: Re: Obligation to Loved Ones in Suspension 
 
I have read Allen Lopp's message on this subject. I say 
again: my question presupposed that the couple involved was 
monogamous. Otherwise, there would be no problem, right? 
 
I realize that monogamy is less common among gays than 
straights. I also realize that there have been some 
successful attempts at polygamy and polyandry. I do live in 
one of the most cosmopolitan cities in the world; in fact, my 
home is in the heart of New York's gay neighborhood, and I 
used to write a column for *The Fetish Times* that entailed 
familiarity with many forms of "alternate lifestyles." Thus, 
I am a little irritated by the seemingly universal assumption 
that I must either be a) naive or b) blinkered by conformity, 
just because I assumed in my example that a couple might 
enjoy conventional marriage. 
 
The fact is, there are many hetero (and some gay) couples who 
have had prior experience of other sexual arrangements, but 
find it more satisfying to bond with one person. It is a bit 
facile to say that monogamy is merely an artifice of the 
church or "social conditioning." Society and religion are not 
just the cause, but also the result, of human behavior. 
 
For a deeply bonded, sexually exclusive couple, the death of 
one person creates a problem which *is made worse by 
cryonics*. I get the impression that this is not a very 
popular thing to say. Everyone seems to want to explain it 
away or minimize it. But, there it is, it exists, and I guess 
that when all is said and done, we don't really know what to 
do about it.
 
--Charles Platt 

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